A: What happened to your girlfriend? That cute math student?
B: She's no long my girlfriend. She's cheating on me.
A: What happened?
B: Yesterday I called her and she told me she's on the bed wrestling with three unknowns.
Teacher: Maria, give me sentence starting with the word "I."
Maria: I is a girl.
Teacher: No Maria, not "I is," say "I am!"
Maria: Okay, I am the nith letter of the alphabet.
Beaver1: I slept with your mom last night.
Beaver2:(no response)
Beaver1: Hey, I slept with your mom last night.
Beaver2:(no response)
Beaver1: Did you not hear what I said? I slept with your mom last night.
Beaver2: Dad, go home, you're drunk.
Einstein, Newton, and Pascal are in heaven, and they decide to play hide+go seek. Einstein starts counting: "vone, two, shree ..." Pascal runs and hides. Newton draws a square and stands in it. Einstein eventually opens his eyes and says, "Newton, you idiot, you vere supposed to hide, vhat are you doing?" And Newton replies, "I am (a) Newton over a meter square, therefore I am (a) Pascal."
Two africans go to London and get on a double deck bus. The first one says, "Go up and see if there is space because it's full here." After a few minutes, the second comes back and says, "we can't sit up there because there is no driver. We should stay down here."
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